Tarot: The Aeon Cafe

Monthly Tarotcast for June 15 - July 15, 2010

2010-06-16T14:47:00.005-05:00

Each month, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

• Overview

Four of Cups: The general energy of this period is mainly that of over-correction. The energy of this card warns against too much of a good thing. Needing some comfort, stability and emotional security after intense activity and deep spiritual exploration can be appealing, but this card shows us how easy it is to go from comfort to crushing boredom, from mothering to smothering, and from cozy familiarity to contempt – and the resulting winds of rebellion can blow pretty hard.

• Week 1

The Devil: Moving into the first week of this period, our lack of insight or mere surface understanding of a situation brings our deepest fears front and center. Focusing on limitations and restrictions causes us frustration and can lead us to cling desperately to people or situations. The temptation to take the low road, to use the end to justify the means, and to overindulge in obsessive thoughts and behaviors is strong this week. To counteract the tendency toward these energies, refuse to be enslaved by your own (or anyone else’s) desires, open your eyes wide (including your third eye) and ground yourself – physically and spiritually.

• Week 2

The Sun: During the second week of this period, we’re enjoying rewards, recognition for our hard work, success and a sense of vindication if we’ve had to struggle through opposition or obstacles to bring a task to completion. Resolutions are showing results, especially if we’ve promised to make healthy changes like losing weight, exercising, or eating healthier foods. The great thing about a “win” is what it does for our self-confidence. If we did it once, then we can do it again. If we’ve succeeded in one aspect of our lives, we can extend that into other areas of our lives.

• Week 3

Five of Disks: The third week of this period highlights choices for us. Do we use the positive aspects of this card: patience, practicality and a conservative approach, or do we let anxiety, fear and worry overwhelm and paralyze us? Sometimes watching, waiting and biding our time is the best course of (temporary) in-action. But we need to let go mentally, emotionally, and energetically also, or the energy of this card will keep us up nights, tossing and turning, chewing our fingernails and our sheets, all over some terrible thing that hasn’t actually happened (and won’t).

• Week 4
Lust (Strength): In the final week of this period we experience new energy and enthusiasm for anything and everything that we feel passionate about – whether that is our relationships, our work and careers, our creative endeavors, or our spiritual journeys. What may present challenges are moderation and balance. Unbridled excitement and overconfidence can trip up our feet while our eyes are on the stars. Otherwise, this is a great time to begin or continue exploring anything (and everything) that sparks your interest.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Copyright 2010© Dona C. Murphy, Destiny Tarot®
"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registered
trademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

Monthly Tarotcast for May 15 - June 15, 2010

2010-05-13T18:36:00.004-05:00

Each month, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

Overview

Three of Cups: The general energy of this period is celebration and joy. Happy occasions shared with family and friends as well as opportunities to socialize and party for any reason – or no particular reason at all – will be highlighted this week. Be ready for good news about upcoming engagements or weddings, birth announcements, pregnancies – even promotions and career advancements. Whether the good news and good fortune are yours or someone else’s; enjoy the lighthearted, carefree freedom of spending time with people you like/love and celebrate successes, large and small.

Week 1

Nine of Swords: Moving into the first week of this period, some of the glow wears off and we experience a sharp shift of energy. Worry and anxiety are high this week and stress-induced problems like insomnia are likely. Fear stemming from “worst case scenario” can convince us that we’re about to suffer a major loss or have the rug pulled from under us. The best antidote for this is balancing out negative thinking with the reminder that many of the things we worry about and stress over never actually happen. As a further caution, feeding the “what if” beast can actually become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Week 2

Ace of Swords: During the second week of this period, we’ll experience the benefits of clarity, courage and mental strength. This kind of sharp insight can cut both ways, so be sure that you’re using your power for constructive purposes. This is an ideal time to cut away dead weight and illusions, to pare down to core truths. We find ourselves in a decisive mood and we’re able to communicate complex ideas in fresh ways. Problem resolution is strongly favored through this entire period, make the most of it!

Week 3

Eight of Swords: The third week of this period invites us to integrate the energy of the previous two weeks and look at the ways in which we limit ourselves or keep ourselves from living life to the fullest. Fear of the unknown and uncertainty can keep us locked in a prison of our own making. When our mental energy is focused on solutions, we’re empowered and effective. When we’re mired in worry, we waste our energy or create more problems and difficulties. The experience we have is largely determined by our perceptions. In the wise words of Wayne Dyer, “when we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change.”

Week 4

Ace of Cups: In the final week of this period the energy is perfect for new or renewed love of all kinds. Yes, this includes romance – but also a new start in a desired direction, new opportunities, new awakenings and rekindled enthusiasm, excitement and passion. After all of the intense mental energy of the previous weeks, we once again connect with our hearts. Our emotions are engaged in positive, creative and beneficial expressions. Follow your heart and luck will be on your side.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Monthly Tarotcast: April 15 - May 15, 2010

2010-04-16T11:46:00.003-05:00

Each month, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

• Overview
The Moon: The general energy of this period is grappling with fear and the dark night of the soul. Mercury Retrograde affects this entire month’s cycle, so very likely our shadow side will manifest in ways we’ve seen – and ignored and avoided – before. If we’re willing to face the unknown with courage, we can reap the benefits of heightened intuition. By confronting our fears, we learn that much of what causes us anxiety is merely illusion. Our worst course of action is succumbing to panic or paranoia.

• Week 1
Three of Disks: Moving into the first week of this period, we discover ways to integrate our knowledge, skills and experience to create a viable plan of action. This particularly affects our career and work environment, but applies to practical matters in our personal lives as well. We are confident that we’re on the right track and our efforts will be recognized and rewarded, and that confidence is supported by practical reality. With the influence of the Mercury Retrograde, adapt this week’s energy to taking extra care in communication (especially at work) and make sure you check and re-check work product – dot the Is, cross the Ts, stay on-task and on-message.

• Week 2
Knight (King) of Cups: During the second week of this period, we find that healing, home and family take on new and greater meaning in our lives. We may also be interacting with people for whom these are high priorities. Mercury retrograde’s influence may make for some wide swings between evasiveness and bluntness in communication (especially in romantic relationships!) We’d do well not to take things too personally, and do more listening than speaking. Answers to our spiritual and metaphysical questions will be found close to home too.

• Week 3
Two of Wands: The third week of this period invites us to be bold and courageous, and to embrace the energy of our partnerships and associations – romantic and otherwise – for the ways in which we differ and complement each other. The most harmonious connections are marked by the different strengths each member brings to the party. Unless arrogance or a domineering attitude prevail, all’s well.

• Week 4
Death: In the final week of this period, which also marks the end of the Mercury retrograde period, major transitions and transformations sweep the old “stuff” away to make room for the new. If the work suggested by the Overview (The Moon) has been completed, it should be easy to welcome these changes with a sense of optimism and positivity. Without the shadows of fear and doubt, the future looks pretty promising.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Copyright 2010© Dona C. Murphy, Destiny Tarot®
"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registered
trademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

Monthly Tarotcast for March 15 - April 15, 2010

2010-03-16T13:13:00.003-05:00

Every month, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

Overview

Four of Cups: the general energy of this period is protective and nurturing, what we commonly think of as the maternal instinct. Caring, affection and the creation of emotional stability will be recurring themes during this month, and we will likely be looking for ways to express ourselves in terms of unconditional love. All of this can contribute to a period of relative ease and feelings of security; however, we will do well to avoid the shadow side of this card’s energy: possessiveness, attempts to bind and restrict others through “love” and “smothering” instead of mothering.

Week 1

The Hermit: moving into the first week of this period, we find that (temporarily) taking the solitary path will aid us in our search for truth. Solitude and being alone don’t have to mean feeling lonely, and we may find we actively seek and very much enjoy our own company this week. Probing our own inner consciousness and exploring our psyches will not only appeal to us, the insights we gain and the discoveries we make can bring us solutions to long-standing problems or issues, and give us the seeds of new ideas and directions in which to sow them.

Week 2

Princess (Page) of Wands: During the second week of this period, we can use the positive energies of this card for objectivity and clear insight. Studying, learning and otherwise improving our minds and mental faculties are highlighted this week. At best, the positive qualities of this card allow us to sparkle with wit, intelligence and impressive logic. We’ll also need to expect the unexpected where news and information are concerned.

We may find it’s easy to slip into the role of Devil’s Advocate, or to argue both sides of an issue with equal passion and conviction. If expressed negatively, we have a tendency to be argumentative and even vengeful. Last but certainly not least, our sexual charisma is high this week: we’ve got our mojo working and we’re ready, willing and able to spark – so be responsible and cautious around combustibles (people or situations).

Week 3

The Magus (Magician): The third week of this period invites us to become the conscious creators of our reality this week. Through our imaginations and our ability to think and visualize, we translate ideas into action. Self-confidence and a sense of personal power are ours to enjoy! The challenges and more difficult energies presented by this card are aggression, misuse of our power, and blind, impulsive desire that takes no one and nothing else into consideration. Avoid any tendency to willfully lie and deceive, or trick others into doing our bidding by manipulation.

Week 4

Knight (King) of Disks: In the final week of this period we shift from maternal energy to paternal energy. Pragmatism, wise cultivation and use of assets and resources (anything of material value) are highlighted during the final week of this period. Fidelity, loyalty and trustworthiness are highly prized commodities as we move forward methodically, planning our work and working our plan. Avoid ultra-conservative, dogmatic or stubborn modes of thought and communication, and reap the rewards of perseverance and planning.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Copyright 2010© Dona C. Murphy, Destiny Tarot®

"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registeredtrademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Monthly Tarotcast February 15 - March 15, 2010

2010-02-12T15:57:00.004-06:00

Seven of Swords: The third week of this period highlights self-protective energy. We needn’t allow others to take advantage of us, and we’re being put on notice to actively guard against that. Foster healthy skepticism in uncertain circumstances, but don’t fall prey to paranoia. You may need to negotiate carefully and keep your own cards close to your vest, but avoid outright mistrust and unnecessary secrecy. Either of these will only serve to further complicate matters.

Week 4

Three of Swords:

In the final week of this period we may find ourselves experiencing loss and heartbreak despite our best efforts. Again, a reminder that the energy of Week One (Nine of Cups) will carry us through the worst of the situation if we’re able to accept some temporary distress. Intense emotions require clear-sightedness. Denial, repression and escapism will only worsen the discomfort. We need to be prepared to let go of whatever we must for the wish of the first week’s energy to come to manifestation and fruition.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Copyright 2010© Dona C. Murphy, Destiny Tarot®

"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registeredtrademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Monthly Tarotcast January 15 - February 15, 2010

2010-01-15T19:38:00.004-06:00

Week 1

The Devil: moving into the first week of this period, our lack of insight or mere surface understanding of a situation brings our deepest fears front and center. Focusing on limitations and restrictions causes us frustration and can lead us to cling desperately to people or situations. The temptation to take the low road, to use the ends to justify the means, and to overindulge in obsessive thoughts and behaviors is strong this week. To counteract the tendency toward these energies, refuse to be enslaved by your own (or anyone else’s) desires, open your eyes wide (including your third eye) and ground yourself – physically and spiritually – this week.

Week 2

Death: The second week of this period – and the hits just keep on coming. Change is inevitable, even welcome. If we’ve used the best energies of the Devil, we can embrace change as freedom from ignorance, blindness and bondage. If we’ve succumbed to temptation, or let our deepest fears rule us, change will come with a wrenching and painful finality that rocks our world. New chapters open and new life begins – face the future joyfully and fearlessly.

Week 3

Five of Disks: The third week of this period highlights choices for us yet again. Do we use the positive aspects of this card: patience, practicality and a conservative approach, or do we let anxiety, fear and worry overwhelm and paralyze us? Sometimes watching, waiting and biding our time is the best course of (temporary) in-action. But we need to let go mentally, emotionally, and energetically also, or the energy of this card will keep us up nights, tossing and turning, chewing our fingernails and our sheets, all over some terrible thing that hasn’t actually happened (and won’t).

Week 4

Four of Cups: In the final week of this period we may find ourselves over-correcting for the intense energies of the preceding weeks. The energy of this card warns against too much of a good thing. Needing some comfort, stability and emotional security after three tough and challenging weeks can be appealing, but this card shows us how easy it is to go from comfort to crushing boredom, from mothering to smothering, and from cozy familiarity to contempt – and the resulting winds of rebellion can blow pretty hard.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Love and peace,

Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Copyright 2010© Dona C. Murphy, Destiny Tarot®

"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registeredtrademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

Monthly Tarotcast Dec 15, 2009 - January 15, 2010

2009-12-15T15:00:00.002-06:00

Every month, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

Overview

The Ace of Cups: the general energy of this period is new or renewed love of all kinds. Yes, think romance – but also a new start in a desired direction, new opportunities, new awakenings and rekindled enthusiasm, excitement and passion. Our emotions are engaged in positive, creative and beneficial expressions. Follow your heart and luck will ride with you.

Week 1

Eight of Wands: moving into the first week of this period, prepare yourself for mostly positive communication, despite the onset of Mercury retrograde. With a little extra patience and attention to details, good news still arrives quickly although not as quickly as it might without Mercury’s pranks. Don’t lose heart or give up if an initial delay occurs, it’s almost certain to. The best use of this energy especially during the retro is to keep on keepin’ on, with an optimistic outlook around all forms of electronic communication, technology in general, and travel in particular.

Week 2

Two of Cups: The second week of this period allows us to reconnect and renew partnerships of all kinds, especially romantic ones. With the Mercury retrograde, we may be tempted to rekindle relationships from the past, and that can be a mixed blessing. I’m referring to that late-night phone call from an ex who may be feeling nostalgic and wondering what you’re up to. With proper care and awareness, you’ll likely to be able to distinguish between those partnerships and connections that are truly worth pursuing, or are simply manifesting to give closure and perspective.

Week 3

Prince (or Knight) of Wands: The third week of this period is a cautionary exercise. Know someone (especially from your past) whose enthusiasm, charm and energy can sweep you (and everyone else) right out of your Jimmy Choos? Be prepared to meet or reconnect with someone who may have a deeply spiritual side that he hides beneath a playful, devil-may-care mask. But don’t count on that mask slipping off during this time. If you can match this person for carefree, playful nonchalance – have a ball. If not, best to channel your own energy and charm into something and someone less volatile.

Week 4

Three of Disks: In the final week of this period we find our focus shifting back to the realm of career and work. After the emotional holiday season, we get back to business and realize that our experience, abilities and contributions at our workplace are being recognized and rewarded, even if a little later than anticipated. We’re also confident that we can identify and implement the things that work best for us – not only in our professional lives but personally and spiritually.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit: Destiny Tarot®

Copyright 2009© Dona C. Murphy, Destiny Tarot®"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registeredtrademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

Monthly Tarotcast for November 15 – December 15, 2009

2009-11-15T17:08:00.004-06:00

The Tower: the general energy of this period is sudden and unexpected change in a major life circumstance. This card is a wake-up call and appears as a way to release us from old, outmoded or restrictive structure; and offers us the opportunity to break free and rebuild from a new foundation up. Although on the surface this card rarely signifies good news, it can bring a flash of divine insight and enlightenment on a spiritual level, the same way a bolt of lightning illuminates a dark, threatening storm. “Resistance is futile, Earthling”, so make the most of this energy by gracefully preparing for sweeping change.

Week 1

Two of Wands: moving into the first week of this period, we know what needs to be done, and we’re doing it. We’ve laid the groundwork and have prepared ourselves for success, often by forming a beneficial alliance or partnership. Some friction or conflict may accompany the free exchange of ideas and the solidifying of plans and processes. This energy needn’t degenerate into aggression if both parties remain respectful and keep the common goal clearly in mind.

Week 2

The Hierophant: The second week of this period allows us to reconnect with organizations, groups, our families, religions or corporations. That major shakeup of the status quo we saw in the overview of this period now represents the way we diplomatically push back and respectfully clarify our position in our dealings with the establishment (whatever it is). The positive take-away from this energy is that playing by the rules – even our own – will help us achieve what we desire.

Week 3

Prince (or Knight) of Cups: The third week of this period invites us to use the charm and romantic charisma of this emotional prince to our benefit without becoming deceitful or manipulative. Gentle persuasion, patience and grace are the intuitive gifts of the person signified by this card. Heartfelt communication, honest expression and a spiritual approach to problem solving all serve us well in this period. We really can catch more flies with honey than we can with vinegar, so (ethically) sweeten up the pot.

Week 4

Three of Wands: In the final week of this period we find our past efforts beginning to pay off in positive and encouraging ways. The partnerships, teams or groups we’ve aligned with are infusing the situation with combined talents and skills, and the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. A sense of empowerment and confidence draws the right kind of attention in professional and personal situations.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2009© by Dona C. Murphy.
"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registered trademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

2009-11-10T17:00:00.001-06:00

Monthly Tarotcast October 15 - November 15, 2009

2009-10-15T16:52:00.004-05:00

Every month, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

Overview
Ace of Swords: the general energy of this period is clarity, courage and mental strength. This kind of sharp insight can cut both ways, so be sure that you’re using your power for constructive purposes. This is an ideal time to cut away dead weight and illusions, to pare down to core truths. We find ourselves in a decisive mood and we’re able to communicate complex ideas in fresh ways. Problem resolution is strongly favored through this entire period, make the most of it!

Week 1
Death: moving into the first week of this period, we are confronted with major changes – this is a period of transition and transformation. We can use this energy to our benefit by being flexible, adaptable and open to what’s new and different. We can willingly go forward and accept what’s inevitably coming, or we can resist and be forced to conform. This is a good period to be mindful, choose wisely and understand that we can face the unknown without fear.

Week 2
Ten of Wands: The second week of this period allows us to free ourselves from oppression and burdens that aren't ours to carry. This energy can easily degenerate into workaholism, martyrdom and self-imposed restriction, so it's tricky to navigate. With the right perspective, we can use it for empowerment and liberation.

Week 3
Two of Disks: The third week of this period echoes the major energy of Week 1, call it a ripple effect. Smaller changes in the form of adjustments and maintaining balance are featured. We may be juggling multiple demands but we’re doing it with grace and style. Harmonizing both the best energies of Weeks 1 and 2, we can easily multi-task. The only caution is to avoid spreading ourselves too thin.

Week 4
Six of Wands: The final week of this period finds us enjoying victories – large and small. We’ve successfully completed a task or project. In spite of everything that’s come our way, we have prevailed and we’re rewarded for our hard work. Celebrate and know that whatever good comes from this, you have earned it through perseverance and self-confidence.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Copyright 2009© Dona C. Murphy, Destiny Tarot®

"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registeredtrademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

Monthly Tarotcast for September 15 – October 15, 2009

2009-09-14T17:35:00.004-05:00

In each month’s newsletter, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

Overview
The general energy of this period is assistance, aid and support. This can come in the form of financial gains, but isn’t limited to money or other resources. In many ways the help we receive can indicate that we’ve turned a critical corner and we’re on the right track to something better. Both personally and professionally, we see success in partnerships that are mutually beneficial. This can be quite pragmatic – “you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours”, but can also transcend the mundane and manifest as shared wisdom and healing along with shared material goods.

Week 1
Moving into the first week of this period, we have the ability to cut through irrelevant information and get to the heart of things. Good judgement, intellectual insights and independent thought are all highlighted during this time. We may feel justified in speaking our minds, and doing so in a way that’s fair and emotionally detached may serve well. Avoid vindictive, spiteful outbursts and hidden agendas.

Week 2
The second week of this period brings the end of Mercury retrograde and an end to some past situations, relationships or life cycles. If we’ve the used the energy of the past period to our best advantage, we find that we can start fresh. New ideas, new perspectives and new life cycles highlight this period. The last “re”s of the retrograde period are re-generation, re-newal and re-lease.

Week 3
The third week of this period is one of comfort, nurturing and warmth. This is a great time to invest in and focus on all of our emotional relationships – with our romantic partners, friends and family. We’ll find it easy to relate to others, and our listening skills give us plenty of opportunities to relate to and empathize with others’ experiences. Whether you’re male or female; if you find yourself wanting to mother someone, just don’t smother them.

Week 4
The final week of this period finds us tapped into a seemingly inexhaustible reserve of energy, optimism and creativity. Our main focus is on work – how we make a living and how we make our lives meaningful. We will also find ourselves feeling healthy and strong, and looking to improve our health in all areas; emotional, physical, mental and spiritual. The only caution here is not to let our boundless energy and enthusiasm become bossiness, meddling or a bid for dominance.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Love and peace,

Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2009 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registeredtrademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

Monthly Tarotcast for August 15 – September 15, 2009

2009-08-13T19:16:00.003-05:00

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registeredtrademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without my permission.

Monthly Tarotcast

2009-06-18T13:53:00.005-05:00

For June 15 – July 15, 2009

Overview
The general atmosphere of this period will bring final resolutions to problem situations and cycles ending. To some extent we can feel that change is being forced upon us even if we are the ones making the decisions and calling the shots. Resist the urge to analyze (or over-analyze) situations, relationships and even your own point of view. Stop agonizing, and the transition becomes easier, even a welcome turn of events.
Week 1
Moving into the first week of this period, we find that clearing the dead wood and ending the cycles or situations indicated by the Overview allows us to embrace new situations, relationships and attitudes. These feel distinctly different from those of the past, and we enjoy a sense of being on the right track, working from our strengths. Standing on a newly built (or rebuilt) solid foundation, we begin planning for our future success while still enjoying where we are at present. This is a great time for starting and/or developing relationships of all kinds. It's also a great time for movement - whether a literal, geographical move or a metaphorical one.

Week 2
The second week of this period is a great time for assertive communication. This period is a time for not taking problems or issues too personally or emotionally, so that we can be taken seriously. Accept constructive criticism in the spirit it's offered, and be prepared to take an active part in all solutions, decisions, creative problem-solving or planning. Heart-to-heart talks, sincere conversations, and honest input/feedback are all highly featured during this time.

Week 3
The third week of this period is an ideal time for all of us - men or women - to connect with our feminine side. This is yin energy at its finest, highest manifestation. Openness and receptivity are the rewards of having communicated with more detachment and intellectual dispassion during Week 2. Now, we reap the benefits of more nurturing, emotional and even passionate exchanges at a time when they benefit us and others the most. One caution during this period: resist the urge to mother/smother the people you care about most.

Week 4

The final week of this period shows us that it's clearly time to make some decisions. If following this month's guidance has brought us some much-needed resolutions, there are still some issues that we're afraid to deal with, or that we're remaining willingly blind about. Temporary truces and compromises can only serve up to a point. If a stalemate still exists, it's in our best interest to take action on our own behalf.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

"Destiny Tarot" and the Destiny Tarot logo are the registered trademarks (servicemarks) of Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.
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Monthly Tarotcast for May 15 - June 15, 2009

2009-05-17T11:53:00.006-05:00

The general atmosphere of this period will be challenges, difficulties and the courage to meet them head-on. This doesn’t mean our successes come without a certain measure of struggle – mostly with ourselves, and self-doubt. We will ask, “Have I got what it takes?” We do if we believe we do, and if we trust our internal compasses.

Week 1
Moving into the first week of this period, we find the Mercury retrograde (which began on May 6th/7th) playing some of its usual tricks as we try hard to hang on to what we have – whether material possessions or ideas – that make us feel safe, stable and secure. In this case, Mercury the Trickster pulls the rug out from under us by making us feel dissatisfied with the very same things we’re holding onto the tightest. This is a good week to (re-)examine and (re-)assess our values; and to cultivate a sense of irony.

Week 2
The second week of this period reminds us that sometimes delays and postponements can actually work in our favor, if we take a healthy and longer-term perspective beyond immediate gratification. This temporary standstill may feel especially restrictive if we insist on rigidity, inflexibility and “victim consciousness”. This time can be used to our advantage and benefit if we’re patient and willing to loosen up – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Mercury will station direct on May 30th, to a collective sigh of relief, but we won’t quite be out of the woods.

Week 3
The third week of this period continues to test our strength. Have we exercised patience and loosened our strangle-hold on things that represent the old order and outdated structures? Challenging as it is to let go of what no longer serves us or satisfies us, the rewards of doing so can be great. If we’ve done so, we should feel a certain calm confidence that what we’re working toward is manifesting even if we can’t yet see it. If we’ve been stubbornly clinging, we’re in for a wrenching, disruptive and destructive end to our reverse-ride on the roller coaster.

Week 4
The final week of this period shows us what happens if we’ve ignored the advice and opportunity of the previous periods. If we’ve blindly held on, we’re about to get knocked on our stubborn butts. Change has arrived! It can be the breath of fresh air we’ve prepared for and anticipated with positivity, or it can be the tornado that rips through all of that rigid structure and order leaving rubble in its aftermath. Choose well and you get to be Dorothy (complete with ruby slippers), choose poorly and you’ll wind up with a house on you (à la the Wicked Witch of the West).

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Monthly Tarotcast for April 15 – May 15, 2009

2009-04-17T19:19:00.005-05:00

Each month, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

• Overview

The general atmosphere of this period will be fulfillment and satisfaction. Remember last month’s celebratory atmosphere? This is the “morning-after” all that joyful partying, but without the hangover or big after-party mess to clean up. We’re happy, we’re grateful, we’re feeling the after-glow. But, it’s time to look forward and move forward to next steps and new things. This energy also speaks to long-term commitments in romantic relationships. Nice that it comes after the Venus Retrograde! Venus turns direct in gentle Pisces on April 17th.

• Week 1

Moving into the first week of this period, we’ll be looking at people and situations in a fair, balanced and impartial exercise of (mostly good) judgment. Contract negotiations, formal (and informal) agreements of all kinds can be worked out smoothly during this period as long as both sides come to the table with fairness in mind. On the other hand, unfair, manipulative, “win-lose” situations will probably break down during this time.

• Week 2

The second week of this period reminds us to pay close attention to our dreams (sleeping and waking). Fears and anxieties held in the unconscious can surface during this period, resulting in nightmares or panic attacks if we’ve severely repressed or tried to resist working through our issues. We may find sleeping difficult or be restless and irritable during our waking hours. On the upside, our intuition and psychic abilities will be highly tuned during this period. As long as we’re aware of true intuition flashes and not simply giving form to our fears, this can be a very helpful influence.

• Week 3

The third week of this period gives us a chance to cut through irrelevant or obstructing junk to get to the heart of things. This is a period of quick thinking and analysis, with strong intuitive flashes that can positively influence our decisions and judgment. Once again, fairness is a strong component of this energy, however patience is not. The independent, fair-minded thinker will not suffer fools gladly during this time.

• Week 4

The final week of this period gives us an opportunity to indulge our sensuous, pleasure-loving natures. Passions run high, charismatic individuals who may remind us of someone from our pasts – or actually be a romantic partner from our past – can appear (or reappear) in delightfully alluring ways. This is potent, creative energy and while it is definitely sexual, it can also manifest in non-physical ways too. It feels like emotional and energetic Spring, gearing up for a very hot Summer!

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2009 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Monthly Tarotcast for March 15 – April 15, 2009

2009-03-18T12:11:00.004-05:00

My apologies for the delayed posting. In my blog, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

• Overview

The general atmosphere of this period will be celebration and joy. Our happiest occasions shared with family and friends; from Saint Patrick’s Day through the Spring Equinox and beyond, beautifully embody the energy of this period. Be ready for good news about upcoming engagements or weddings, birth announcements, pregnancies – even promotions (yes, I know the economy is still pretty dismal – or is it?) If nothing else, enjoy the lighthearted and carefree freedom of socializing with people you like/love, and make up a holiday if need be.

• Week 1

Moving into the first week of this period, opportunities for learning come in many forms. On the practical side, formal and informal education, training and skill-building are highlighted during this period. Both spiritually and practically, we begin to focus on the benefits of the education process itself, we work toward building a solid foundation of knowledge, wisdom, understanding and application of what we know.

• Week 2

The second week of this period reminds us that true partnerships sometimes involve friction, and the time when sparks are flying can be the time new solutions and ideas take form. Focus on arriving at consensus by respectfully and actively listening to others, whether they are colleagues at work, our friends, spouses, kids or parents. If we focus only on our differences, friction can result in outright conflict instead of a lively exchange of ideas – success depends on our choice to make interactions win-win situations.

• Week 3

The third week of this period can further upset a shaky sense of security, as news about the economy isn’t promising. But we can ask ourselves some questions that may help stabilize us: “Am I buying into poverty consciousness? Am I suffering, or do I only think I am because of media bombardment?” Yes, times are tough. And when the going gets tough, we owe it to ourselves and our loved ones to take care of our health, try to eat well and sleep well, and to lower our stress levels by turning off the news.

• Week 4

The final week of this period gives us an exciting glimpse of what’s to come this summer. Think turning over a new leaf, a new chapter beginning, optimism and enthusiasm. We find that we are filled with new ideas and feel confident to manifest them. Start the wheels turning, because projects, ideas, plans and investments (whether material or emotional) should bear delicious fruit in June, July and August of this year.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call or Keen-mail me today to arrange a reading and get a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities!

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2009 © by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

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Monthly Tarotcast for February 17 - March 17, 2009

2009-02-17T14:10:00.004-06:00

Each month, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

The general atmosphere of this period will be strength in adversity and clarity. Using our intellect, courage and determination in constructive ways, we further our personal growth and goals. We cut through illusions, delusions, misperceptions and material obstacles to discover or renew our personal sense of truth. New ideas applied to new situations and the use of innovative, new thinking to resolve old situations and issues help us get to where we want to be. If it’s not our ultimate goal, then it’s a new step in the right direction towards that goal.

Moving into the first week of this period, love in all its forms ignites our senses. New romantic possibilities, renewed commitments to existing relationships of all kinds, and deep spiritual connections are all highlighted during this period. Some pleasant surprises in our careers can develop quickly – an unexpected chance for extra money, a new position or promotion, or even new ways to do our existing jobs and gain appreciation and praise are all strong possibilities during this period.

The second week of this period reminds us to take good care of ourselves and not to allow others to take advantage of us. There are some underhanded, suspicious and tricky energies active through this week. No need for paranoia, but be extra cautious about get-rich-quick schemes and remember the old saying that “if something sounds too good to be true, then it probably isn’t true”. Trust yourself, be straightforward with others, but don’t assume everyone is singing off the same lyric sheet. Take others’ words and intentions under advisement, and reflect on them.

The third week of this period promises a sense of abundance. Though we’re in challenging times, there are still many ways to nurture and be nurtured, to both give and receive graciously. Especially in times like these, it’s good to remember that poverty consciousness, fear, and contraction can become self-fulfilling prophecies. Gratitude for the blessings we have brings more blessings in, and generosity of spirit is more far-reaching than generosity with cash.

The final week of this period invites us to create consciously. We find that we are able to translate ideas into actions. Synchronicities, serendipities and almost magical “coincidences” manifest during this period. After the warning to be cautious during the second week of this period, we receive confirmation during this week that trusting ourselves - our intuition and instinct – can cause some wonderful things to materialize.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you'll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life's possibilities!

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2009 © by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Ya Shoulda Put a Ring on It

2009-01-17T13:16:00.002-06:00

Oh-oh-oh, I think I’m in love with Beyonce’. No, not that way –I’m not outing myself, there’s no “out”, I’m boringly heterosexual. But I love, love, love her latest song* and I’m encouraging all of my “single lady” clients and sorta-single-but-don’t-really-know clients to buy it, download it, play it, watch the video, make the song their ringtone, make it their anthem. Chances are if Mr. Man doesn’t know what he wants, he doesn’t appreciate what he’s got.

In it’s catchy, can’t stop singin’ along way, this song reminds us all that men need to step up if they want to keep us. If they don’t want to, or don’t know, it’s ok for us – more, it’s healthy for us to move on. His manning up doesn’t have to mean he presents us with a literal engagement or wedding ring (depends on the couple and the circumstances), but he does need to speak up and say, “I want to be your one and only, and I want you to be mine.”

It’s empowering to know we deserve love, and respectful, loving treatment from our men. It’s a sign of self-confidence and knowledge of our self-worth to step back or step away from men who cant’ or won’t step all the way into a relationship, but don’t have the maturity and decency to step all the way out either.

And don’t start with the “but Dona, I don’t look like Beyonce’ ” stuff either. Guess what? Neither do I. Guess what? Neither do a lot of us. It’s not about looks – it’s about attitude – and I mean that word in the best possible sense. Put a little sassy in your chassis when you dance to the song, have some fun, and believe in yourself for approximately 3 minutes or so. Then give me a call to find out how your new attitude can improve your love life!

Love and peace,
Dona

*Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2009 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Ask A Tarot Card Reader...Again!

2008-08-02T17:46:00.006-05:00

My good friends Tom and Lisa at 95.1 FM invited me back on the air. Here's an edited version of the broadcast - music and most commercials, news and weather were omitted.
Just click on my blog title above to hear the show!

Check out the Tom and Lisa Morning Show at 95 WIIL Rock!

Enjoy!

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2008 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Setting Healthy Boundaries: Dealmakers or Dealbreakers?

2008-04-30T17:34:00.004-05:00

Yesterday – the Dealmakers list, your own personal standards that express healthy, positive boundaries; that make your non-romantic relationships a source of happiness for you and enrich your life. Today – “don’ts” or the Dealbreakers list, the things that raise a red flag and make you seriously reconsider or step back from someone as a potential romantic partner. These boundaries are your own “line in the sand,” and knowing them before you become involved with someone can save you wasted time, tears, and heartache. Notice I didn’t say, “Before you become attracted”? Attraction can happen in an instant, without knowing a single thing about a person. Involvement however, is a choice.

I like to call the Dealbreakers “Get thee behind me, Mr. Unavailable”. Once you are clear for yourself on these, in combination with your Dealmakers, you’ll know your own standards and know whether the qualities and behaviors of a man you’re interested in are what you really want – before you become emotionally invested and involved.

The Dealbreakers list

First, think about the things that go into making a healthy romantic relationship and give it a good chance of developing and working for both people involved. Then think about the things you aren’t comfortable with, aren’t prepared to accept, that you dislike or that bother you when they are part of a relationship. This list is for you alone, so be honest and write them down in a short list. Be specific - i.e., no abuse (of any kind), the man isn’t married/attached, is not a player, etc., but don’t nitpick or try to nail down every possible trait/quality.

These are your standards – and your dating action plan. If the man doesn’t meet the basic standards at the get-go, or if you find he has stepped over the line or tested the boundaries you’ve identified as unacceptable to you, you need to take action. Real action is not a long discussion or an explanation/justification of yourself or your feelings. Run away, walk away or at the very least take one huge giant step backwards and stop. Your boundaries only mean as much to others as they do to you. If you won’t honor your own, it’s very unlikely that they will.

The behaviors you accept, rationalize, accommodate or excuse from the man in your life (or the one you’re hoping to have a relationship with), can quickly become the relationship standard or status quo and it’s much harder to reject a behavior once you’ve quietly accepted it. By rejecting the behavior, you give a man a choice – to respect you or to let you alone. And if he can’t respect you, what else can’t he do? Be emotionally, physically and spiritually available to you? Be kind, considerate, honest and trustworthy?

Natalie Lue, author of “Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl” states that emotionally unavailable men are adept at manipulating women and relationships to their advantage. She says, “The ability to get you to adapt to their dysfunctional behaviour is a masterstroke on their part.” But consider this. Could you be manipulated by a friend into stealing something or harming someone? Could they convince you to go against your own better judgment, ethics, your standards? And if they could, or would try – are they really your friend?

Healthy boundaries and personal standards work! They affirm that we respect ourselves, love ourselves and want those things in return from our relationships.

Love and peace,
Dona

“Mr. Unavailable”, “Fallback Girl” copyright Natalie Lue.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2008 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Setting Healthy Boundaries: Dealmakers or Dealbreakers?

2008-04-29T15:49:00.004-05:00

I’ve been reading a great little e-book, “Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl” by Natalie Lue, who’s a very funny and extremely wise, common-sense kinda gal! The book inspired me to blog, so thank you Natalie! Although I’ve been in a great relationship with my Mr. Available for six years; it’s not so terribly long ago – well, about six and half years or so actually - that I was in a string of relationships with Mr. Unavailables. Yes indeed – been there. Done that. Got the T-shirt and the souvenir key ring.

One thing I found myself doing early on in my current relationship – quite by happy accident, since I rarely apply good common sense upfront and consciously in romantic matters, was:

- interacting with no assumptions or expectations, but a clear idea of my standards
- using the same standards that worked in non-romantic relationships with friends, family, co-workers, clients and the clerk at supermarket
- being comfortable and confident that my standards really reflected who I am as a person – how I treat people and how I like to be treated

Often we women have no trouble setting healthy boundaries in non-romantic relationships. So, the things we like and want in these relationships can serve as our “dos” or deal-makers. While it’s true that men and women communicate differently, we’re all human and there are some basics that facilitate healthy human interaction.

The Dealmakers list
To begin, think about the things that make your best (non-romantic) relationships work – what makes them enjoyable, desirable, fun, and worthwhile? You can write them down as a short list. Be specific - i.e., mutual honesty, consistency (doing what we say we will do, others doing what they say they will do) consideration (we take our own feelings and those of others into account). When both people in a relationship bring these qualities and behaviors to the table, a healthy relationship is usually the result.

Whether you realize it consciously or not, these are your standards – stated as positive boundaries. If there’s a big disconnect between these qualities – which help your non-romantic relationships work in a healthy way - and the behaviors you accept, rationalize, adjust for or excuse from the man in your life (or the one you’re hoping to have a romantic relationship with), this should raise a big, bright red flag. You may be setting yourself up for heartache with a “Mr. Unavailable”.

Part II: Dealbreakers, or “Get thee behind me, ‘Mr. Unavailable’”

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

“Mr. Unavailable”, “Fallback Girl” copyright Natalie Lue.

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2008 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

What’s on Your Radar?

2008-03-30T14:25:00.003-05:00

A client recently asked me, “so, what’s on the radar?” I knew what she meant, but in that moment I had a clear, strong vision of a busy air traffic control tower. All the screens were full of moving blips, all the controllers were intently focused on the patterns there, firing off information into their headset microphones – for the next day’s flights.

I shared with her what I had seen and we both chuckled a bit. Then, she grew somewhat serious and said, “But you’re a Tarot reader – you’re supposed to tell me what’s coming up in the future, right?” Yes, true enough. Do it all the time. But the time we have and the time we’re in is now and that’s the jump-off point for any reading. Quantum physics tells us it’s all now and while I believe that’s true, it’s still pretty challenging to communicate from the concept of completely transcended linear time. Ok, I just confused myself – in other words, it’s a helluva lot easier to speak and think in terms of the past, present and future.

When we attempt to focus on and see only the future, in a reading or in any aspect of life, several things happen.

We ignore or miss the here and now
When we’re in pain, anxious or uncertain, this can actually seem like a good thing to do. But, now is what we have – and whether there’s a lesson to be learned, action to be taken, or valuable information coming in – if we miss it, we miss a golden opportunity to make positive changes in both the present and the future. Much as we might love to just skip the “now” if it’s unpleasant; we can’t really live in or “be” in the past or the future – only the present.

We ignore our own intuition
Tarot reading, or any form of divination, is designed to help us learn from and integrate our past in order to understand, and positively affect our future based on who we are and where we are in the present. But as wonderful as that is, it can’t ever be better than our present-moment experiences and the opportunity they present for our own intuition to give us real-time, real-life guidance, wisdom and truth. Tarot is a great enhancement to our own intuition but a very poor substitute for it.

When the temptation is strong to try and look only at the future in a reading, think about being on one of today’s flights while those busy air traffic controllers all have their radar set on tomorrow…

…and thank you for flying Destiny Airlines!

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2008 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Failing Forward

2008-01-19T16:59:00.000-06:00

No, that’s not a typo. Failing forward is a way to turn mistakes into opportunities for success. Ah, mistakes. We all make them. We wish we could completely avoid them, which would of course make us perfect. Or, having experienced failure, we give up because we equate failing at something with being a failure. We can judge ourselves so harshly that we swear we’ll never again risk, never try, never dare.

What if we could change our perception of and response to failure? Many famous and distinguished people in the arts, sciences, business and sports have failed – sometimes spectacularly so, on their path to achievement.

John Maxwell is an American expert on leadership and author of “Failing Forward” who says that the major difference between achieving people and average people is their ability to move beyond failure and use it as a lesson and a stepping-stone. With the right attitude, positive benefits can come from negative experiences. When we realize that the task or goal is not “us”, we can look at failure as a way to learn what went wrong and what not to repeat. By depersonalizing the experience (we are not “failures” just because we failed at something) we minimize and overcome fear. And, without fear – we can take action again!

Here are some great ideas for learning to fail forward from author Marilyn J. Tellez, MA:
1. Failing forward is really about achievement as a series of trial and error opportunities.
2. You, as a person, are not a failure. Failure is a state of mind.
3. You are not a victim. Take responsibility for what you can control and put yourself into a position of power. (And what you can control is yourself – DCM)
4. You can control how you let a trauma affect you. (I would say, you can “choose how you let a trauma affect you” – DCM)
5. The present is the only place real opportunity exists and where you can take action.
6. Letting go of limiting beliefs may be hard on the ego, but your ability to move forward will increase dramatically.
7. When you have a vision, you have a view that puts failure in its proper perspective.
8. There is always uncertainty when you try something new.
9. You can't make significant progress by doing it all yourself. Let your environment and network do some of the work.
10. Often, the only difference between success and failure is simple persistence.
11. Knowing when to let go and try something else is important. Failing forward is about getting up and moving on. (And what you do once you get up – which is not repeat the same mistakes! - DCM)

So here’s to failing and falling, learning and growing, going forward and succeeding in the New Year!

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2008 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

The Ultimate in Customer Service

2007-11-19T12:54:00.000-06:00

Is God the Hairy Thunderer? The Cosmic Muffin? Or is God the Ultimate Customer Service Rep?

God (Source, Spirit, the Universe, the Higher Power) answers every prayer, and the answer is never “no”. I can hear many of you saying to yourselves, “That’s not true! No way! B******t!!” When I read this little pearl of wisdom from an e-mail I received; which doubtless has made the rounds of cyberspace many times, that’s what I said to myself.

Then I thought about it a bit. First I thought about all the happiness, success and joy that have come into my life. All those “yes!” answers – God was really listening and paying attention those times, for sure!

When I thought of all my disappointments, unmet expectations, dreams that hadn’t materialized and perceived failures – my own as well as those of others – I said, but those must be the painful, heartbreaking “nos”, or the prayers God must not have heard or bothered about. The more I compared what I thought was an unanswered prayer, or a prayer answered by a cruel, harsh, resounding “no” with these responses, I realized that anything I had prayed for or about had been answered – with the best possible answer.

So, now I’m onboard with this little tidbit of e-mail wisdom, and a believer.

I believe that God only gives three answers to prayer:
1. "Yes!"
2. "Not yet."
3. "I have something better in mind."

Give it a try with your own prayers – the ones that you celebrated as a Yes, but especially the ones that you felt had fallen on deaf ears or been denied.

Love and peace,
Dona

“Hairy Thunderer” and “Cosmic Muffin” from Deteriorata, National Lampoon, 1972

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

My First Radio Show!

2007-10-01T12:59:00.000-05:00

I’ve been invited to the Tom & Lisa Morning show on 95.1 FM (95 Will Rock!), a northeastern Wisconsin/northeastern Illinois radio station. My live, guest broadcast with listener call-ins is on Wednesday, October 3rd beginning at 7:30 a.m CDT. Their morning show is fun and lively, featuring talk as well as hard rock. I’m a bit old for Ozzie and Metallica, but hey – I get to talk about what I do, how I do it, and take live calls to answer general questions about Tarot as well as give free readings to their listening audience.

I am really looking forward to Wednesday morning and hope you can join in to listen live via the radio or through their web simulcast at: :95 Will Rock!

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Buddha and the Blue Streak*

2007-08-13T13:51:00.000-05:00

Lately, I’ve had several clients consulting me about their career opportunities. Whether looking for work while unemployed, or seeking to better their career prospects through new jobs, the questions focus on both the exhilaration and frustration of the search process.

In many ways it’s like the dating process – the mutual evaluation between the seeker and the prospective employer, waiting for phone calls, looking for ways to best meet our needs and do something that brings us a rewarding experience as well as offering our best to the other party.

Another similarity to the dating process is the feeling of vulnerability that comes from “putting ourselves out there” and risking rejection. However, without risking potential rejection we also eliminate the chance for acceptance.

When a client of mine recently expressed through a series of e-mails the wild upswings and downturns she was experiencing during her job search, she stated her frustration with the process and her feelings of exhaustion. Her feelings were constantly fluctuating based on the moment-to-moment changes in her situation: a good prospect turned out to be a poor match, an offer from a very desirable company didn’t come, an offer came that wasn’t very desirable or suitable…all of us have been through these experiences, and it often feels exactly like a ride on a wild roller coaster.

I addressed her concerns with this, a Buddhist perspective:

"Suffer what there is to suffer. Enjoy what there is to enjoy. Regard both suffering and joy as facts of life, and continue… no matter what happens.”
From the Gosho of Nichiren Daishonin

It is counter-productive and detrimental to our health and well-being to repress, deny or try NOT to feel what we feel; whether it’s elation and excitement or disappointment and sadness. The key is non-attachment: to feel what we feel yet not attach a sense of permanence or meaning to the feeling beyond the present moment.

That overused cliché of the day, "it is what it is" actually expresses the core of this philosophy. It's when we take our feelings (which are transient) and attach to them as a fixed state (“things will always be this way…) or extrapolate from them future states (“this is how it’s always going to be…it will never change…”) that we get ourselves into trouble.

We step on and strap into the roller-coaster ride when we allow external circumstances to hit us where we live (our internal center of self-confidence, self-esteem and our sense of self-worth). The mercurial changes in our mood and feelings, excited and happy one moment, disappointed and anxious the next moment, are a result of attachment. External circumstances change all the time - often radically, and they turn on a dime. The more attached we are, the rougher the ride - up, down, up, down, over and over, all the time.

So in work, in love, or in any situation where you find your feelings and moods alternately soaring and plummeting; stop and take a breath. Step back. Observe and recognize the transient nature of each moment. You will regain your center, feel calm and comfortable in your own skin – and be happy.

Love and peace,
Dona

*Blue Streak is a roller coaster ride at the Cedar Point amusement park in Sandusky, Ohio.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Does The Golden Rule Measure Up?

2007-07-13T12:34:00.000-05:00

We all learned it, probably as small children. We've all heard it a million times. Simple yet profound, the concept is easy to grasp but can be incredibly challenging to live. “Treat others as you would like to be treated.”

This basic moral principle is found in nearly all religions and cultures. Also called the ethic of reciprocity, the context in which we find ourselves applying it can make a world of difference in its effectiveness and validity.

The ability to put oneself in another’s shoes is one way that the golden rule works. It allows us to go beyond our personal preferences or idiosyncrasies and add another dimension to the principle, “Treat others as you would like to be treated, if you were them.” Otherwise in applying the rule I might feel it my duty to buy everyone I know chocolate ice cream, even if they dislike chocolate or are allergic to it.

The really tough issues arise when the “other” doesn’t honor the Golden rule, or lives by a different rule altogether. Let’s say you’ve treated someone with kindness, respect and compassion, yet they’ve treated you with cruelty, carelessness and a lack of consideration.

Now what?

This is where several ethical systems come into conflict and competition with the Golden Rule and with each other.

The Silver Rule: Do not do to others what you would not have them do to you
This rule avoids responding in kind, seeking revenge or retribution – getting an eye for an eye, or getting two eyes for an eye. So it doesn’t repay cruelty or violence with cruelty or violence, but it doesn’t sit back and get steamrolled either. Non-violent assertion, standing up for one’s rights and what one believes in without sinking to the other’s level can be a powerful means for change. It might even get the other to realize the error of their ways and correct them. But it’s hard to imagine a sociopath being shamed or embarrassed into changing his or her ways.

The Brass Rule: Do to others what they do to you
This is the classic response in kind. Repay kindness with kindness and evil with justice at best, revenge or retribution at worst. This is familiar to most of us and for better or worse, where most of us operate. The problem with the Brass Rule despite its apparent logic is that it can and often does create an unending cycle of evil and violence, especially since kindness and peace are hard to live, and evil and violence are easy.

The Iron Rule: Do to others as you like, before they do it to you
This is the classic show of contempt for the Golden Rule. Many people operate from this position, openly or secretly. They will do whatever they feel they can get away with, whatever they feel will give them power or an edge over others, and other people’s actions; good, bad or neutral have no bearing on the situation.

We get to choose
A personal code of ethics that works is a hard thing to come by, especially in the face of so many competing and contradictory belief systems. The Golden and Silver Rules don’t adequately address injustice, evil or just plain bad behavior. The Brass and Iron Rules are at best, subsistence level survival, dog-eat-dog laws of the jungle at worst.

In an essay on the Golden Rule, Harry J. Gensler writes: “The golden rule is best seen as a consistency principle…It only prescribes consistency that our actions (toward another) not be out of harmony with our desires (toward a reversed-situation action). It tests our moral coherence. If we violate the golden rule, then we’re violating the spirit of fairness and concern for people that lies at the heart of morality.”

When we align ourselves with a principle which seeks to serve the highest good of all, we are moral beings, even if we fall short or strive and occasionally fail.

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Would You Rather Be Right or Be Happy? ~Part II

2007-06-12T20:24:00.000-05:00

As we know from Part I of this article and have known all along, men and women are different. In Part I we looked at some ways in which women reduce their awareness of what’s actually happening in a relationship with their Mr. Man (idealization, minimization and projection). While these will often create “false positives” in our perception, we can also create false negatives if we’re basing our behavior on negative thought patterns.

Just a note: While men can and do engage in these psychological processes to the detriment of their relationships with women, I am writing from a woman’s perspective and keeping the focus on what we as women can do in our communication and dealings with men to improve the quality of those interactions.

Perception Becomes Reality

Most of us experience some very negative feelings from relationships that have failed. Broken relationships can leave us feeling abandoned, can lessen our self-esteem and can make us feel that a happy, loving relationship is simply an impossible dream. If these feelings are temporary and we can move past them, they’re unlikely to do any permanent damage. However, these feelings can solidify into beliefs that survive the initial hurt and disappointment. Once that happens, they will influence our future experiences and lead to some of the following behaviors that hurt our chances for a happy relationship:

Seeking Approval and Validation

When our self-esteem is low, we women often engage in two behaviors. Approval seeking can take some subtle forms, but the underlying message is, “I’m OK, right? You like me and think I’m pretty enough, smart enough, thin enough to maybe love, don’t you?” While it’s wonderful to get praise and encouragement from our Mr. Man this message basically says, “If you don’t think (X, Y, Z) about me, I’m nothing.”
No healthy person wants to be held responsible for another’s core feelings and beliefs about themselves. It’s too big a responsibility to place on anyone, and it’s not their job.

Validation is getting outside confirmation that what we believe to be true about ourselves is in fact true. This can be a real double-edged sword, most particularly if we are holding negative beliefs about ourselves. The idea of the self-fulfilling prophecy applies here, as does the idea that we will (perhaps unconsciously) behave in ways that will bring about the desired confirmation.

These fear-driven behaviors will send a reasonably healthy man (and nearly anyone else) packing. They are attempts to control another even while the person engaging in them is feeling the most out-of-control herself. This often leads to one of the biggest “DON’TS” I can think of, and I call it:

Freak and Speak
So here you are, in the throes of fear, feeling out-of-control, and “knowing” that everything is doomed, including your relationship with Mr. Man. He’s going to abandon you, he doesn’t love you, he doesn’t want to ever speak to you again, and he’s finished with you. All of your worst fears about everything negative that can possibly go wrong in the relationship are screaming in your brain. You’re sick to your stomach, your palms are sweating and you’re in tears. You are officially “Freaking”.

So what do you do next? You Speak. You phone him up. If he answers, you proceed to babble hysterically about all the things you “know” are going on with him – because you’re feelings are telling you it’s all true, right? You tell him what he’s thinking and feeling, how he’s trying to leave you, how he’s doing you wrong and isn’t going to get away with it… Or you leave a message in his voicemail to that same effect. Or, you write him a twenty-page e-mail stating the same things.

For a moment, put yourself in the recipient’s shoes. True, he may have not called when he said he would, or he may have not shown up on time for your date, throwing the plans into chaos. These are not good things. These behaviors need to be addressed. However, if instead of addressing the specific bad behavior, you spew all of your feelings (your worst fears, in this case) the guy is going to say, “Huh?” Or maybe he won’t say anything, just shut down completely. And if you’re standing in his shoes, can you really blame him?

So, what can we do differently? Most men are problem-solvers by nature. Give him something that he can actually fix, a problem he can actually solve – and chances are, he’ll do it. Don’t ask him to fix what he can’t (your worst fears), and don’t assume he won’t change his behavior (that assumption comes from a negative belief).

So, what can we do differently? The “DO” I suggest is this:

Feel and Deal
We are entitled to all of our feelings – from the most positive to the most negative. Attempting to fight them often entrenches them more deeply, as “what we resist, persists.” Feelings are transient states; they will change if we acknowledge them, accept them and allow them to exist – simply by realizing that they are not permanent and are part of an ever-changing perception of reality.

What we aren’t entitled to do is act on every feeling we have and expect others to sort it all out for us, and make it all OK. Our feelings are ours. No one likes to be treated badly, disrespected or disappointed. But bad behavior does not necessarily have to mean that our worst fears are being realized. In fact, most often it doesn’t mean that at all. It is our job to differentiate how we feel about the specific bad behavior – then deal with that; from how we feel when we believe our worst fears are coming to pass, and deal with that.

If we are asking, forcing or demanding that the other person deal with our fears for us (which they can’t do and isn’t their responsibility) they won’t do it. Or if they do it, they will do it grudgingly and resentfully, and look for a way out of having to do it again in the future. If we are asking them to do something about their own behavior (which they can do and which is their responsibility), we are dealing with them fairly and giving them the chance to do the same with us. If they do, we will know something important about their character and about their feelings for us. If they don’t, we’ll still know something important about their character and about their feelings for us.

See? You can be right AND be happy.

Stay tuned - this article will almost certainly have a Part III.

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Would You Rather Be Right or Be Happy?

2007-06-06T19:38:00.000-05:00

Men and Women are different. Ok, I’ve said it and you’re ready to cruise right past this post because you know that. That’s no major revelation and there are no insights to be gained from such an obvious and clichéd observation. Stay with me – it gets better. I promise.

We meet and fall in love with Mr. Man. We know there’s a connection because we feel it, and we immediately assume two things: 1) that he feels it too and 2) that his feelings are exactly like ours and will be expressed exactly like ours. That’s what is supposed to happen, that is what should happen. Right? (Loud buzzer here) WRONG!

These assumptions are probably the biggest mistakes we make as women. I am NOT man-bashing. I don’t believe that all men are dogs, are only out for sex, or are emotionally unavailable and withholding. But while most (normal) men have the capacity to experience the full range of emotions just as we do, they are different – in the way they express those emotions (or don’t), and the way they act on those emotions (or don’t). As women, we may even know and accept this, at least intellectually; but we still find ourselves saying, “But if he would just share his innermost thoughts and feelings, if he would just ‘say the words’, if he would just…”

What we’re really saying at that point is “if he would just be like me, express himself as I do, and act as I do - there’d be NO problem.” We believe that we’re right and they’re wrong; that our way of being in the world and experiencing our feelings is the right one, theirs the wrong one. And if we insist on being right, we probably won’t be happy because a man is going to pick up on those beliefs and assumptions, start backpedaling like crazy or vanish altogether. In a way, we can’t blame him – who wants to be told they’re wrong?

Some interesting things happen for us when we fall in love. Some are biochemical and some are psychological. The psychological pitfalls can blind us to what’s really going on in the relationship and can keep us trapped in the assumptions that will derail the relationship.

Idealization/Minimization:
To idealize someone is to grace them with every desirable, positive quality we can imagine whether or not they actually possess any of these qualities. It’s to make them a paragon of perfection even though we all KNOW that no one is perfect; not them, not us. To minimize is to ignore, excuse, explain and make unimportant any undesirable or negative characteristic. These two processes are common to the early stages of falling in love with someone. They are the means by which we slap on a pair of designer blinders and staple them to our faces so they don’t fall off. And if we persist in them unaware of what we’re doing to ourselves, they will lead us to say and do things that are detrimental to our emotional well-being and happiness. Why? Because we won’t be seeing the real person or their actual behavior. We’ll be acting out a script of preconceived notions and they will be just the stage-dressing.

Projection:
To project is to attribute or put onto the other person our own thoughts, feelings, characteristics, intentions and motivations. If we persist in doing it unaware of what we’re doing; we will miss what is actually happening (or not) with the other person. In other words, we really won’t know what they’re thinking, feeling, what type of character they possess or what their intentions and motivations really are. Ironic, really - because that’s exactly what we say we WANT to know from men!

Happy or Right? How about Happy AND Right!
So what can we do to eliminate the pitfalls and mistakes we make and find out who this man is that we’re dealing with, and whether we really want to be dealing with him? How do we find out how he feels and what he thinks? It’s simpler than you may imagine.

Be Honest
First and above all, with yourself. If you don’t want a casual fling or a one night stand, know that. Don’t try to “shortcut” yourself or him into a deeply committed relationship by being physically intimate before you’re comfortable and ready to do so, thinking that will bond the two of you into a committed relationship. This isn't about "morality". For many women, sex equals commitment. For many men, sex does not equal commitment. Don’t assume that he wants the same things you want either generally (he’d like to settle down and marry the right woman, when he finds her) or specifically (that he decided the moment he met you that YOU are that woman). And don’t think that the fastest way to his heart is through his…er, um…yanno.

Set Realistic Standards
You’ve been honest with yourself and know you don’t want a casual fling or a one night stand. Good. Know also that a committed long-term relationship isn’t going to happen with every guy you meet nor will it happen overnight. Maybe once in a great while two people meet and instantly everything falls perfectly into place, they are lifelong partners forever after without a bump or a bobble. But let’s go on with the more usual process – which is that you two will need to get to know each other to find out whether or not this is “it”.

Have some minimum, basic requirements about his behavior matching what he says. If he says he will call and doesn’t, or if he cancels or won’t make dates until the last minute; don’t jump in to excuse or forgive too quickly. If it only happens once, there may be a valid reason for the slip. But you won’t find out if it’s truly a one-time occurrence or an emerging pattern unless you wait and see – patience in this case is truly a virtue! Hurrying to fix things and accept things that you don’t like or that disappoint you isn’t going to help; it’s going to hurt you and the relationship.

Listen more than you speak
Ah, if I could only take my own advice on this one! Maybe Mr. Man isn’t the chatty type (my Mr. Man sure isn’t). We women have a tendency to want to fill the gaps and break the silences, often to our detriment. But the patience and wisdom to allow the other person to speak in his own way and at his own pace – and to really listen to what he says – is a way to hit the mother lode in the Information Gold Mine.

It’s what we say we want from him, but we won’t get it if we expect and assume that he should chatter away with us the way our female friends do. Some men are talkative, but if you pay attention you will notice that usually what they’re talkative about isn’t how they’re feeling or their inner emotional experience. How and what he talks about – work, sports, hobbies, his likes and dislikes - can nonetheless yield a lot of important data on the kind of man he is. And that can tell you if he’s the kind of man for you!

I’m pretty sure there will be a Part II to this post – stay tuned!

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Don’t Let Their Baggage Become Your Carry-On

2007-06-03T13:24:00.000-05:00

That’s Mr. Man’s or Ms. Herself’s emotional baggage, of course. We’ve all had some of our own to carry, since no one gets through life unscathed by broken relationships, broken promises and broken hearts. Many of us have learned that we can choose when to stop carrying that beat-up old backpack or that full set of matching Louis Vuitton; to conveniently lose the claim check and leave that stuff slowly rotating on the carousel at the airport.

I believe that we attract what we are emotionally and vibrationally, but I also know that when interacting with others especially in romantic relationships; we can blur our boundaries. Next thing you know, instead of attracting someone with a high vibration, we’ve allowed ourselves to be drawn into the lower vibration of the Drama Queen or King. This is not to say that the emotional problems he or she is experiencing aren’t real, although many people are adept at blowing the tiniest thing out of proportion in order to gain attention and sympathy. Or, they’re using the problem as a way to avoid personal responsibility, commitment, accountability and intimacy.

Big or small, real or imagined, the problem – that emotional baggage – is theirs.

You’re a loving, compassionate, evolved person so your first impulse may be to help. If you pick up the burden, sling it over your shoulder or strap it to your back, you’re not providing real help, you’re enabling. If they let you do it, they don’t want real help, and they want someone with whom to play the game: Rescuer (that’d be you) and Victim (that’d be him or her).

In the game, you get to provide support, encouragement, understanding and infinite patience while trying to provide enough emotional energy for you both in order to sustain and maintain the relationship. They get to wallow in self-pity and inadequacy, and continue to play the role of emotional wreck - damaged and helpless. The game gets old when you resent the fact that the Victim isn’t getting it together no matter what you do, and they resent that you don’t want to remain the Rescuer on a full-time, permanent basis.

If you truly want to help, set healthy boundaries and stick to them. Can you still offer support, encouragement, understanding and patience? Absolutely! When appropriate, offer suggestions or ideas for solving problems and healing past hurt. Then, watch and listen. If they are truly ready to be assisted in helping themselves, they will respect and appreciate what you’re doing. Whether by implementing your ideas and suggestions or coming up with their own, they will begin to take problem-solving action. They will begin the journey toward healing themselves and releasing the past. The two of you may then be able to journey together: each carrying what you need, unnecessary junk left behind, and traveling light.

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

My Karma Ran Over My Dogma!

2007-06-01T17:27:00.000-05:00

“I don’t believe in karma!” read a post I saw recently on one of the several online discussion groups to which I belong. My first thought in response to that was the tongue-firmly-in-cheek saying that became the title of this article. We certainly can believe or disbelieve in whatever we choose, but no one put it better than Daniel Moynihan: “Everyone is entitled to his own opinion. He is not entitled to his own facts.” I’m sure there are people out there who don’t believe in the law of gravity. There are probably some who hold so adamantly to that belief that they jump off cliffs secure in the knowledge that they won’t plummet to earth and splatter like an overripe tomato on the ground below. Um…, good luck with that.

Karma is a law, like the law of gravity. True, one is a spiritual law and the other physical, but as above, so below. They are both impersonal and operate whether we choose to believe in them or not. The word karma is Sanskrit and literally means deed or action; its concept is rooted in Eastern religious philosophies – Hinduism, Buddhism and others. But esoteric Christianity and Rosicrucianism teach a very similar principle, "the Law of Cause and Consequence/Effect".

Karma balances, karma levels. When our dogma – those points of view, opinions or beliefs we hold with conviction and certainty even without adequate grounds to support them – meets up with the Great Equalizer the revelations can be both shattering and enlightening. Change comes whether we want it or not, whether we’re prepared for it or not, whether we’re accepting of it or not.

When our karma runs over our dogma, the moment can feel like the rubber meeting the road, taking us over the speed bump to roll on forward; or it can feel like we’re going over the cliff, to splatter like the tomato as we land. Our actions create dynamic causes and effects; the only true constant is change.

Gentlemen (and Gentlewomen), start your engines!

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Just For Fun! Astrology After-Sex Talk

2007-06-01T17:19:00.000-05:00

I can’t take the credit for writing them, but I recently received this e-mail and it gave me a good laugh so I wanted to share it. Recognize yourself? Your Significant Other? Your Ex? A really awkward ONS* (gasp!)? I know there’s more to astrological compatibility than sun sign pillow-talk but if these were real, they’d tell you a lot about the relationship!

Aries:
"Okay, let's do it again!"

Taurus:
"I'm hungry, pass the pizza."

Gemini:
"Have you seen the remote?"

Cancer:
"When are we getting married?"

Leo:
"Wasn't I fantastic?"

Virgo:
"I need to wash the sheets."

Libra:
"I liked it if you liked it."

Scorpio:
"Perhaps I should untie you."

Sagittarius:
"Don't call me I'll call you."

Capricorn:
"Do you have a business card?"

Aquarius:
"Now let's try it with our clothes off!"

Pisces:
"What did you say your name was again?"

*OneNight Stand

Enjoy and feel free to share :)

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

What’s a Self Worth?

2007-05-25T12:42:00.000-05:00

The current monetary value of the elements in our bodies and our skin is $4.50. That’s only a bit higher than the price of a gallon of gas in most of the United States. The U.S. Bureau of Chemistry and Soils invested many tax dollars in calculating the chemical and mineral composition of the human body to determine their net worth. But it’s living inside that skin, and the complex structure and function of those chemicals and minerals that lead us to explore and understand our worth. The terms “self-worth” and “self-esteem” are often used interchangeably, but they actually describe different states of being.

Our self-esteem is how we feel about ourselves and can vary depending upon what happens to us. Get that promotion at work, and self-esteem soars. Fail a test or strike out on the game-winning pitch, and down it goes.

Our self-worth is our intrinsic and inherent value – in other words, simply by being in this body on this earth, we are worthwhile and valuable. We can sometimes lose touch with our self-worth. We can forget that we are valuable.

I'd like you to consider something that you may or may not have thought about before. When you don’t get that promotion at work, when someone chews you out for missing the game-winning pitch, your self-esteem can be temporarily affected, and you may not feel so good about your self, your skills and your abilities. For most of us that effect is short term. For some of us with high self-esteem, we may acknowledge, “yes I missed that, but it’s ok. I’ll do better next time around.” Either way, we move beyond it, and sometimes those dents and dings actually help us and motivate us.

So, some combination of our own self-perceptions and the perceptions of people and events in our environment will affect our self-esteem.

Who decides?

When you allow someone else's actions toward you or opinions of you to determine your self-worth, you hand over all your power to that person(s). In essence, you’re telling yourself (and the Universe) that someone else - no matter how flawed, screwed up or deeply in error they themselves may be - is in a position to judge you and define you.

Sometimes if we persist in the belief that our parents or our ex-lover has the power to devalue us in so profound and primal a way, we devalue ourselves and forget or lose touch with our self-worth. Why any of us would persist in believing that, I don't know. No one likes to be rejected and each of us wants to be loved, admired and appreciated, especially by those people in our lives who are important to us. But to make them the standard by which we then value ourselves is a sure way to become or remain miserable and lost.

You do!

How can you reclaim your sense of self-worth? Meditation, prayer, reflection, and introspection can all help you re-connect with and rebuild a positive, loving relationship with yourself. Whether or not you believe in a higher power, and however you connect with it if you choose to, you do have a primary relationship to nurture and maintain – with yourself.

An intuitive counselor, spiritual guide or advisor using Tarot or other tools can help you in this process. When you’re ready to rediscover and reaffirm your worth, taking the inward journey with a trustworthy partner can be a valuable and richly rewarding experience!

“SELF-WORTH comes from one thing -- thinking that you are worthy.”
~ Wayne Dyer

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

He Might Be a Sociopath If…

2007-05-22T12:04:00.000-05:00

Are you involved with a sociopath?

Most of you are probably familiar with comedian Jeff Foxworthy’s now-famous, “You might be a redneck if…” Funny stuff! But before you skip this post, thinking to yourself, “No way! My Mr. Man (or Ms. Herself) may be a little bit insensitive at times, but he (she) can’t be a sociopath! They’re those crazy serial-killers, aren’t they?” Stop. Think again.

Essentially, sociopaths do not have a conscience. This means that they grasp the difference between good and bad, right and wrong, but they don’t care – that knowledge doesn’t affect their behavior. Research shows that some 4% of the population fit the definition of a sociopath. That means about one in every twenty-five people. Certainly not all are violent criminals or even engage in illegal activities. But, amoral or unethical behavior? You bet your life. Look at it this way – one in every twenty-five people can and will do anything at all – anything – without feeling the slightest twinge of guilt, remorse or conscience.

So, what are the “tells”; the signs that maybe your significant other or co-worker might be one of that one-in-twenty-five? I’ll use “he” in my examples for clarity and to be brief, with all due respect to the male population – I’m not male-bashing, I promise! These can apply to either sex and to any relationship, not just romantic involvements.

He might be a sociopath if…

• He has a superficial charm, a charisma that makes him seductive (sexually or otherwise)

• He has an over-inflated, grandiose sense of his self-worth that’s initially compelling – at first, people (you?) fall for it hook, line and sinker

• He has a strong, constant need for stimulation

• He has had trouble with the law or had behavior problems as a child which always included the failure to acknowledge responsibility for any of these problems

• He is able to lie repeatedly and convincingly without displaying any anxiety, tension or emotional distress

• He is manipulative and can “act the part” of a caring, loving person in order to get his needs met

There is no cure for sociopathy; no therapy or drug that can grow a conscience, empathy or genuine human emotion and true intimacy. People like this experience emotions differently than we do. They don’t experience love at all, nor do they bond or form positive attachments to others. Their ability to convincingly “act” as if they do is what makes them so dangerous.

How do we avoid or limit or involvement with such people? How in the world will we ever know whom to trust? If you find yourself in a struggle between your instincts and the “role” this person has chosen to present – go with your instincts. Your higher self is always observing and the impressions it receives are genuine. It’s there to protect you.

From author Martha Stout, Ph.D., whose book “The Sociopath Next Door” inspired this article, these words of wisdom:

“When considering a new relationship of any kind, practice the Rule of Threes regarding the claims and promises a person makes, and the responsibility he or she has. Make the Rule of Threes your personal policy.

One lie, one broken promise, or a single neglected responsibility may be a misunderstanding instead. Two may involve a serious mistake. But three lies say you’re dealing with a liar, and deceit is the linchpin of conscienceless behavior.

Cut your losses and get out as soon as you can. Leaving, though it may be hard, will be easier now than later, and less costly. Do not give your money, your work, your secrets or your affection to a three-timer.”

Dr. Stout’s book was a godsend to me, as I have had the misfortune…uh, learning experience… of having three relationships with sociopaths in my life. One was a romantic relationship (thankfully and mercifully ended long ago), one was a friendship which cost me a very large sum of money and an even larger amount of emotional suffering, and one was a co-worker at the last corporate job I had (or ever intend to have).

A sociopath can’t be fixed. The sociopath’s behavior is not your fault, and it’s not your job to try to save, rescue or redeem him or her. Save, rescue and redeem your own life and share it with a person who will value and treasure it.

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Published!

2007-05-21T13:12:00.000-05:00

I’m happy to announce that an article of mine will be included in an anthology, The Book of Thoth: Wisdom of The Ages, Volume I. In 2006, I entered a competition sponsored by the Book-of-Thoth website calling for contributions by previously unpublished authors on a wide array of occult, paranormal and metaphysical subjects.

The website, in conjunction with Reality Publishing/Reality Entertainment began a search and judged the 50 best articles from thousands of submissions on topics ranging from Alchemy to UFOs, Divination to Haunting, Magick to mysticism, and every topic of spiritual exploration in between. This is not a self-publishing venture by me or by the Book-of-Thoth website.

The release date hasn’t been announced yet, but the book is scheduled for release this year and should be available very soon.

Here's a link for those of you who’d like more information:

Watch the YouTube Promo!

Love and peace,

Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Getting The Most From Your Reading

2007-05-19T15:54:00.000-05:00

Is that cup half-empty or half-full? The optimist sees it as half-full, the pessimist sees it as half-empty, and the engineer sees that the cup is twice as big as it needs to be! :-)

This week’s tip for getting the most from your reading might be the single most challenging issue we face when we are seeking guidance. I know it’s a major one for me! I can easily be the kind of person who sees that cup as half-empty, and who’s not very adept at getting out of her own way.

I am not Pollyanna, and I know that challenging circumstances, feeling stuck, and seeking change for a less-than-perfect situation can bring out the negativity in all of us. So, even if we don’t feel “positive”, the question can be framed in a constructive way – one that seeks a solution rather than emphasizing (and reinforcing) the problem. Phrasing the question in a constructive way indicates confidence that useful information will come through in the answer.

· Be Positive
Be positive when framing your questions. Consider the difference between each of these sets of questions:

How come I can’t get my book published?
How can I locate the ideal forum for publishing my book?

Why do I get so fearful, freeze up and get nauseated when I have to speak in public?
How can I improve my ability to speak to groups effectively?

Can you help me understand why I always blow my diet when I’m near my goal?
Can you help me find a way to push on to lose that last 10 pounds?

Why can’t I let my guy call me when he says he will? I always jump the gun and call first.
How can I trust myself and my significant other more and let the relationship unfold?

The first questions all have an air of defeat. The second questions are more confident and show that the questioner believes he/she will be successfully given useful advice.

So instead of asking:

· How come I never …?

· Why can't I …?

· Can you help me understand why I always (screw up, ruin, blow it)…?

Try asking:

· How can I improve my ability to …?

· How can I locate, identify, position myself…?

· Can you help me find a way to (succeed, prosper, manifest)…?

I believe you’ll find more clarity from the answers in your Tarot reading if we approach your questions in a constructive, positive way. When you’re ready to give it a try, give me a call!

Love and peace,

Dona

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2006 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:destiny/ Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

Getting the Most From Your Reading: Framing Questions

2007-05-17T19:14:00.000-05:00

As a tarot reader for over 30 years, I've learned that the tarot is a tool for connecting the reader and the questioner in an interactive process that accesses higher wisdom to explore possibilities and choices. Life does not come with a guarantee; a tarot reading is no different. What all of us have is the present, and the ability to choose our thoughts, feelings, intentions and actions for the best possible outcome. Will we sometimes falter and make mistakes? Of course we will, because we're human. A tarot reading can help guide the questioner and help him/her connect to the intuition we all possess and which serves us as an internal compass, if we are willing to pay attention to it. Neither readings (nor readers) can substitute for the life experience of a questioner, nor can the reading or the reader “make” things happen.

One way to open up to the guidance a reading can provide is by taking responsibility for our life situations. This is not to say that the situations in which we find ourselves are our fault. It's neither finding fault nor laying blame - it's accepting and embracing the fact that we are active participants in our lives and can make choices that will work for us rather than against us.

Frame your question to show that you accept responsibility for your situation. Tempting as it is to ask a question designed to tell us what to do; we must accept that the tarot can’t make our decisions for us. We all wish for a guarantee that we're making good choices, but life (with or without a tarot reading), holds no guarantees. Avoid questions that deflect responsibility, such as:

"Yes" or "No" Questions
Questions beginning with "Should..."
Questions asking only about time

Instead, try framing your questions beginning with:
Can you give me insight into ...
What do I need to understand about ...
What is the meaning of ...
What is the lesson or purpose of ...
What are the circumstances underlying ...
How can I improve my chances of ...
How might I ...

I believe you'll find a richer, more useful type of information will come to you through your reading with this simple but effective approach. If you're "stuck" on framing a question, take a moment to allow yourself and your reader to put "you" in the picture as the active co-creator of your situation.

Love and peace,
Dona

Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®

Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2007 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.

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Getting the Most From Your Reading: Framing Questions